JANUARY 1 - JANUARY 7, 2000
JANUARY 7, 2K
The return of Cornplanter
Good morning. It is 32. 4 degrees at 5:52 A.M.
It could have been something from "The Night before Christmas," but
it wasn't. It was real enough, at least to me anyway.
Getting probably the best night's sleep in a week I was awaken by the doorbell. Sharyn
slept right through it. Thank God! She can be a bear when someone wakes her up. I was
careful not to do just that as I grabbed my .45 and my bathrobe as I went to the door to
see who it was. As I did I looked at the clock on the microwave. It was 3:15 A.M.
Seeing the time, I was sure I knew who it was. As I turned on the outside lights, I
found I was right. It was none other than Chief Cornplanter himself. I looked to see if
Red Jacket was with him but he was no where to be found. I opened the door and invited my
friend in the house. For once he accepted my invitation and did not insist that I come out
on the porch with him.
"How have you been?" I asked, hugging the old man to me.
That gesture took him back. He has never enjoyed the embrace of another man. He has
told me that many times. It was just that I hadn't seen him in such a long time that I
couldn't control myself. Fortunately, he could. He pushed me away.
"Don't do that!" he said. "A white man's handshake will do. That would
more than do. Why did you have to do that? You know how much I hate that!"
"I missed you," I said. "I really have. A whole lot has happened since I
last spoke with you. Where have you been?"
"Out and around," he said. "You got involved in the re-election campaign
and I could see that I had no place in it so I moved on for awhile. I was up in Boston. I
was a guest lecturer at Harvard. They really like me there."
"I'll bet they do," I said. "Have you ever lectured at UPB?" I
asked. As I did, he just laughed."What's so funny?" I asked him.
"It's not that it is funny," he said. "Not funny, ha ha, anyway. It is
kind of funny a shame."
"In what respect?" I asked.
"Funny in the respect that they don't want me. I have to go to the Ivy League
schools to be appreciated when right here, on the very land that used to be mine and mine
alone, they don't appreciate the wealth of knowledge that I have to offer. You are the
only one who has ever honored me with books that truly represent me as the man and the
great warrior that I am. And I think that is a shame."
"Thanks," I said. "Thanks a whole lot."
"I didn't mean it that way," he said to me trying to rectify the slam of
sorts. "Actually, I am very honored that you took the time to write three volumes of
stories about me and have the fourth about half finished. It really does my heart good to
know that. You are the only one. It's just that right here the University of Pittsburgh at
Bradford ignores me and teaches things like engineering and nursing when they could have
me as a lecturer and be teaching the history of this place."
I listened intently trying to understand his point. It failed to reach me at first.
"Do you understand what I am saying?" he asked. I was forced to say that I
didn't. I pointed out to him that engineering and nursing were important and very
honorable professions. That was where he corrected me.
"That's just it. They are professions. They are teaching how to make money. They
are not teaching about what we were or where we have come from and how we got here to this
point today. All that is well and good, but what about classical teaching? Who does that
anymore?"
I couldn't answer him. I didn't have the answer. He had a point. Geography, history,
and even writing are pushed to the background in schools today when in the past they were
key subjects. How many of our students know the state capitols? How many of them care? I
got his point.
"And look at you," he said. "In my tribe you would be honored as a great
story teller. In this place where you live and call home they go out of their way to
discredit you and make you out to be a liar.
"I followed the furor over the taxes. I read The Bradford Era. They went
out of their way to try and blame the 43% tax increase on you. They put away all their own
news stories when you wanted the county to stop spending so much money. They put those
stories away and really tried hard to make it sound like you were the cause and the cause
alone.
"And look at the asbestos thing. They had the nerve to make that a top story of
the year and not mention you once. How can they do that? You made it the top story. You
did it when you printed the pictures on the internet and then in The Mountain Laurel
Review. You made it a story when you produced your own movie about it. There it was
the number ten story of the year and not one word about you in it. Doesn't that fry you
when they do that to you? It would me."
I've found with Cornplanter when he is like that, all you can do is agree with him. I
shrugged and nodded my head in agreement.
"Even in the tax story, number two or three, you were left out and you had the
solution to the problem. You wrote a good budget that would have worked. You made sense
when the other two dopes didn't. How could they! They have no concept of what is and what
isn't in the budget. They are depending on Tom Ball. They are in trouble."
Once more I shrugged. I didn't know what to say. He stopped for a moment and then I
calmly gave him an answer.
"My friend," I began. "You are concerned with history. It's over and
done. We cannot rewrite history. What has happened has happened. The top ten stories of
the year, like the usual reporting in The Era, are flawed. They are not factual
and do not represent what really happened. That is why I write even though no one may read
me. In my own way I am trying to give someone an accurate account of what is and has gone
on. That is all I care about. I have no control over the other people and what they do and
do not do. I only have control over me and what I write. That is all I can do."
"You're quitting!" he said to me.
I nodded. In a way I was. I had enough. He knew that. He could see it in my face.
"I like my life now. I have a few projects going. I wanted to do a local radio
show. That didn't work out and now I am looking into getting my own radio station. It
looks good. If that happens, you can do the all night show, or at least be a guest from
time to time. We can be local in the traditional sense, and international using the
internet. We live in very interesting times. Yes we do."
Cornplanter accepted what I said. He apologized for waking me. I asked about Red
Jacket, but he waved me off on that.
"Later," he said. "It is too long and involved. Go back to bed."
With that he left and I went back to bed. I didn't sleep right away. He had given me a
lot to think about. He has probably give you a lot, too.
Comments are welcome at rdhedbud@penn.com.
JANUARY 6, 2K
The Sludge King Cometh!
Good morning. It is 24.6 degrees at 6:30 A.M. high atop the Alleghenies in beautiful
downtown Marshburg, PA, soon to be the home of WMLR-AM Talk Radio, also available on the
net. And I should say that it is one darn shame that we don't have it up and running
today. If we did we could discuss our obese State Senator, none other than Bill
"Sludge King" Slocum.
The Bradford Era reports today:
Slocum kicks off election campaign in Bradford
By SANDRA RHODES /Era Reporter
Way to go, Sandra! You didn't waste any time in the article. You got right into the
fact that the Sludge King has to stand trial for dumping human waste into the Brokenstraw
Creek, a direct tributary of the Allegheny River, which is a tributary of the Ohio River,
which is a tributary of the Mississippi River, which goes on to New Orleans, The
Mississippi Delta and the Gulf of Mexico, which in turn eventually mixes with and goes to
the Atlantic Ocean.
Slocum is not only a slimy little polluter on a local scale, think of the national and
international implications! Hey Amy! Have you been to Padre Island lately? If you have,
maybe you have come into contact with some Youngsville sludge, compliments of our State
Senator who is full of exactly what he is charged with dumping in the Creek. Think of the
nerve of this man, running for re-election.
The Era reported: "Referring to his upcoming trial, Slocum said, "My
personal opinion is that will be determined in court, but we really don't think that has
anything to do with our election."
Oh? How's that?
One man has already committed suicide over this and another has plead guilty and is
pointing his finger directly at Slocum.
The way I understand this, these guys didn't just "accidentally" release
sludge (human solid waste) into the creek. It appears that special construction was
performed and a bypass pipe that went around monitoring devices was in place so that they
could not be checked. Because of this ingenious architecture, Youngsville Borough was able
to pay off the Water Treatment Facility early. That was because they had no expense in
hauling the sludge part away. They were giving it to the world!
And Billy "I never turn down a free meal" Slocum was running the whole
operation. And now he says its the other guy's fault. He had nothing to do with it. And
our politically motivate Attorney General, ole Elmer Fudd himself, agreed with him.
Strange that he State Attorney General couldn't see what the US Attorney could. Smell like
more of the same? It does to me.
Yes, this is exactly what Slocum should do. Run for re-election! Yes. That makes
perfect sense to me. And look who is with him. Look who's talking. The Era reports:
"Ashe Khare, chairman of the northwest caucus of the Republican Party, also came
to Slocum's defense saying he felt Slocum's campaign was important enough for him to be in
Bradford to give his support to Slocum.
"I believe in Bill Slocum," he said. "The lawsuit is frivolous. I would not
happen if he was not a state senator."
"The senator is an honest, hardworking guy," Khare said, describing the lawsuit
"a little nuisance."
They also tell us:
"Also at the meeting, (was) C. Russell Johnson, chairman of the McKean County
Republican Committee."
Now if that isn't a pair to draw to, there never will be. Where was Newt Gringrich and
the other Republican hypocrites to round out the array?
Oh well! One reader sends this on to us regard what Pat Ross of Bleacher's Pub in
Warren said:
Dear Mr. Beck,
I agree with Pat. The Bradford Era must have had a Y2K glitch. If you read their January
1, 2000 edition, you would have seen on the back page that your election loss was story
number 5 of the year. But, then they posted your picture and said that you were story
number 4. So, which is it? Were you number 4 or number 5? Do you come before the timber or
after?
Just Wondering in Florida
To "Wondering in Florida," Probably hanging from the timber!
Comments are welcome at rdhedbud@penn.com.
JANUARY 5, 2K
Et tu, Amy
Good morning. I received the following e-mail from a beautiful young lady in Texas:
Happy New Year!I just wanted to express my condolences on the death of Willie. I
remember her well. Your article about Willie in the MLR literally moved me to tears. I was
so touched by it that I shared the article with one of my co-workers who was also moved to
tears. She left my office wiping her eyes with a tissue. At least you can take comfort in
the fact that neither Willie nor your beautiful red headed little boy are alone.
On another note, I hope your Christmas was wonderful, and I wish you and Sharyn a Happy
New Year. Tell Kim that Sam is going to put her in an old folks' home for dressing him up
in that Santa suit! - Amy
P.S. I agree with Sharyn - Willie looks like a retriever/collie mix.
What does that tell you?
Women stick together. Yes they do. And do you know why they stick together? Because
Sharyn put Amy to bed one night when she had too much to drink and she was very underage.
Of course she was going to agree with Sharyn. Why wouldn’t she! After all, who was
Bud? Chopped liver, I suppose. Bud didn’t do much. Just run off the tough love
people! That’s all! Just goes to show you.
Yesterday was Aunt Rose’s 95th birthday.
Roselle Beck Eschmann was born on January 4, 1905. She remembers the Titanic sinking.
She was in the Empire State Building in 1936 when an airplane crashed into it; and, She
saw the Hindenburg the day it exploded. She participated in the Manhattan Project as a
stenographer and witnessed the first few Atomic Bomb explosions.
Hired by the State of New York in 1924, she worked for every Governor from Lehman to
Rockefeller. She lived through two World Wars and saw men walk on the moon. She has been
very taken with the space programs and was impressed by live pictures from Mars. She
retired in 1973 and came to live with Sharyn and myself in 1996.
She celebrated her birthday with her family. She had a birthday cake and a
"few" cocktails. The first cocktail was, as she put it, "one with
authority." It gave her, she said, "the authority to do whatever I damn well
please." And that she did. God Bless her.
Aunt Rose and her Great Grand Nephew Sam Christmas, 1999
And on another note:
I know it has been slow going since the first of the year. It is like I am hung over,
but I am sure that I will get back in the swing of things very shortly. Losing Willie was
a blow. I think I hear her walking around in the middle of the night. She had long toe
nails and would go click, click on the kitchen floor. I imagine I hear her still walking
around and come out of a sound sleep. Once I am awake, I don’t go back to sleep. I am
up for the rest of the night.
Pat Ross of Bleachers Pub in Warren, pointed out this to us.
Subject: Bradford Era Y2K glitch
If you go to their on-line edition today and go to the bottom of their first page and
click on the new mayor story you will find that you can't get there. Your page fills up
with the first story each time you try to get to the mayor story.
Happy New Year, Pat
So, it appears that they are not Y2K compliant. Round up the usual suspects!
Have a nice day. Your comments are welcome at rdhedbud@penn.com.
JANUARY 4, 2000
"The MisBehavin" (with appropriate apologies to E. A. Poe and Lyde
Van Scoy)
Once upon a Tuesday dreary
While I pondered weak and weary
Over a confusing volume of taxpayer lore,
While I pondered, while I worried,
Suddenly there came a hurried,
Knocking which came fast and flurried,
Knocking on my editor’s door,
"Tis some resident, having problems,"
Said I to the newsroom door,
"Just a taxpayer, nothing more."
The door I slowly ran to open,
stumbling in there came a broken
Battered, bruised and half-mad resident
falling through my open door.
To a chair I quickly led him,
at his look I came to dread him,
Of his woes he begged to shed them,
and I dared say nothing more
To this wild and straggly fellow
Come in through the newsroom door.
He spoke to me with voice so shallow
"In bankruptcy, I now will wallow
For I have paid my taxes
And I shall rue, forevermore.
The commissioners lied,
As green as grass is,
and now you see we’ve lost our A_____." (censored)
But, I said, poor me to say it,
A different tax rate I’ll explore!
Only that and nothing more.
"Why did I say it?
Ask not, I pray it
Just let me think on it some more.
Keep your patience, I implore.
"First, I think that it was stingy
to vote in office Mr. Pingie,
But your mistakes, I cannot fix.
To keep in office such a deceiver
As you did with Mr. Weaver,
and their pockets only fatten
With retention of Mr. Stratton.
They’ll only keep their bag of tricks.
But if they’ll take a pay cut yearly
That will save your taxes dearly
and cut the District Attorney rate.
Of course you will need a freeze
Of non bargaining employee salaries
And the Tax Collector you must eliminate.
Then merge the Tax Claim Bureau with
the Treasurer’s Office--and then if
The Juvenile Law Master can retire
and Judge Cleland then aspire
to do his work as law dictates.
Spread the CEM debt fair
And the Airport Authority’s share
Also stop the Drug and Alcohol
Independent Agency’s contribution
And the ATA’s retribution
and the Solicitor must fall.
Save $44,000 in eliminated
Planning and zoning once created
And get the volunteers on staff
To handle any county call.
The Family Law Master also does
The work of others just because
His boss made up the Law.
And UPB the big receiver
Of money spent by Mr. Weaver
For soccer fields that Board member saw.
The CYS will also boast
Of monies lost since they were host,
And privatize the laundry chore
At Sena Kean, and save once more."
The taxpayer looked like he’d had enough
"I tell you, they lied about this stuff!
What’s next in store?"
I quickly calmed him, reassured him,
wiped his brow and then allured him,
To my budget and I muttered evermore,
"You folks n’er listen,
Always moanin', always hissin'
At these great budgets of yore.
When you voted last election
You now got what you’re expectin’
43% is what’s called for.
Still a deficit is loomin’
Not to put your mind more gloomin’
But, your mills will go up once more.
Without the 20% cutback
You folks will certainly still lack
$695,000 in unpaid bills
A 4 mill increase to you all
From budget writer Tom Ball.
"Now, don’t you wish you’d had Recall?"
And my heart felt very heavied
At the expression he now levied
Of the choice made last November.
This poor fellow, not with glory
But a twisted, tragic story
Is what you must remember.
When you look the tiger in the eye…
"Here, take this budget,
let’s get started."
With that the man then quick departed
And bid a faint "They lie."
When you vote again you townsfolk,
At this editor your fun don’t poke
Think of this poor fellow’s
troubling money sore.
To your future, to your county
Stand your ground and reap a bounty
This I wish you evermore.
---Ghostwriter in the Sky
JANUARY 3, 2000
The first column of the year!
That immediately implies that there are going to be other columns, just as I have done
in the past, for the rest of the year. That is true.
Contrary to the rumors that I have been silenced, I have not. While many wish it was
true, it isn't and I will be here every day to start you off with fine and humorous
thoughts. Tom Clark hasn't gone anywhere either and our on-line staff will grow in the
next twelve months. With Y2K behind us, we look forward to keeping you informed in ways
you have yet to imagine. Get ready for MLR TALK RADIO!
On a local note, we are pleased to see that Jim Buck got that new sweater for Christmas
and has finally learned to use the self-scanning lane at Tops Supermarket. One small step
for Jim. One giant step for Tops.
Speaking of Tops, did they buy the property and are they preparing to tear down the
Rectory at St. Bernard's just to put in a gas station? Don't we have enough gas stations?
How is that zoned, anyway?
I was gratified to be included in The Bradford Era top stories of the year. I
also found it humorous that they couldn't decide whether I was the fourth or fifth top
story of the year. And to have a color picture of me in the special section Eventful
century closed... ...by eventful year, was another great compliment. Thank
you Era Staff!
I am still a County Commissioner until they swear in Al Pingie and the other two. I
will be done somewhere around ten this morning. I am not sorry about that.
I was speaking with Frank Williams at WESB the other day. I was reminded of the
conversation when I saw my picture next to the picture of Bradford High with the caption BAHS
asbestos? The inference in that top story, number ten of the year, is that
the asbestos scare was a hoax. It was not. It was cleverly covered up by the School Board
with the aid of ignorant and imcomplete reporting by The Era, discrediting
the whistle blowers and me for reporting what was happening. Frank, like myself and a
whole lot of other people, was well aware that the asbestos was not a hoax and realized
that people, children included, were exposed.
We had a laugh about it. He asked if I knew what would happen, would I do it all over?
The answer was and still is, Yes!
The picture of me, a side shot with my mouth open denouncing the tax increase, is one The
Era should save. It can be used over and over again in the next few years as McKean
County experiences a series of unprecedented and historically high tax increases. That was
not reported in The Era.
George Petrisek who was not present for the first couple of Donny brooks over the
taxes, was there the day the highest increase in the history of McKean County was passed.
He failed to report that the budget is not balanced. He didn't know himself that the $1.1
million carry forward deficit from 1999 was not included as it should have been.
Even with the increase, we will end 2000 somewhere in the area of $545,000 in the red.
What we saw last Thursday is just the beginning and there is no one in the Court House,
none of the Three Stooges, or Tom Ball himself, who can get us out of that one. It's there
and we will need another two mills in 2001 to maintain the status quo that they are so
anxious to preserve.
What business will relocate here with the highest taxes anywhere in the state? Isn't
Economic Development an Oxymoron? Aren't the people spouting Economic Development moronic?
How can we go forward with such expensive governments to support?
McKean County is on the verge of having it's own Recession. We should prepare
ourselves.
Your comments are welcome at rdhedbud@penn.com.
JANUARY 1 & 2, 2000
Happy New Year!
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